Fall City third-graders’ stories keep the turkey alive

Say you’re a turkey. How far would you go to get out of being eaten in someone’s holiday dinner? Third grade students at Fall City Elementary School let their imaginations go wild in coming up with ways a gobbler might avoid his fate.

Say you’re a turkey. How far would you go to get out of being eaten in someone’s holiday dinner?

Third grade students at Fall City Elementary School let their imaginations go wild in coming up with ways a gobbler might avoid his fate.

Teacher Heath Anyan gave his class the persuasive writing assignment, looking for well organized pieces with a good, strong introduction that could pull the reader in.

His students gave it their all, coming up with pleas from turkeys that weren’t afraid to be clever — or gross and grimy — in their plan for survival. The following are some favorites:

The Terrible Turkey

Don’t even try eating me. Here are some reasons why. One, I smell like month-old cheese, not to mention, I taste so stale and bitter. Two, I found this thing on the road and decided to eat it. Plus, since I didn’t know what it was, I wouldn’t eat me. Last, don’t eat me, because you’ll regret it. I do know a turkey down the road, though. He is plump, juicy and all of that. Eat him!

Think Again

If you want to eat me, you may want to think again! I’ve eaten very little this summer and most of what I’ve eaten was very bitter and stale, and I am not very big. I will taste lumpy because I accidently ate bark. So think again!

The Explosive Turkey

Hey, guess what? If you eat me, you’ll be sorry. Want to hear more? No? Well, too bad. If you cut me open, I’ll smell rotten like eggs. I drank some gas, so if you put me in the oven, I’ll explode. And guess what, I’m fast, so catch me if you can. Ha, ha, ha!

One Disgusting Turkey

Don’t eat me for your Thanksgiving dinner. I am really, really thin and bony. Other turkeys are fat, juicy, and crisp. Also my looks might turn you off and I’m sure I’ll shrink in your oven when you cook me. My meat will taste rotten, and I’m sure my meat is like concrete! That is why you should not eat me for your Thanksgiving Munch!

Terrible Fuzzy Turkey

I’m a terribly fuzzy turkey. You would never want to eat me. First, I’m really spicy, so if you eat me do not put gravy on me! You know I also have a fever, so I think I’m kind of sick. Plus last week I fell into a Sour Patch factory so I’m really sour. Please, please, oh please don’t eat a turkey like me!

The Foul Turkey

I’m a moldy, crispy turkey — garbage. Last week, I was getting ready for Thanksgiving and I fell in a fire pit, so I smell smoky. I eat bugs, spiders and garbage 1,000 times an hour. I go to the river every year and look for rotten salmon that makes me smell. So don’t eat me, because I eat fish guts. Do you agree?